TRUE, FUNNY, KINSTON, N.C. STORIES~VOL. 1

My dad told me this true story that took place in the Forties...

My dad, Allen James “Jay” Ball, was in Lovick’s Cafe, in Kinston, sitting at the front counter. A man walked in and sat down close to my dad at the counter. The man behind the counter said: “Can I help you? The man replied, gruffly: “Give me a sandwich.” The man behind the counter said: “What kind of sandwich?” The man replied: “I don’t care--just fix me a sandwich.” So the guy fixed him a sandwich. When he placed it on the counter, the customer said, rudely: “I don’t want that sandwich.”

All the while this conversation was taking place, my dad was taking it in. He interrupted saying: “You ordered that sandwich now you eat it.” The man said: “Whata ya mean?” My dad, pretty upset by the man’s rude behavior said: “I said, you told the man that you wanted a sandwich and you didn’t care what kind of sandwich, so now; you eat it!”

The man, figuring my dad was serious, picked up his sandwich, moving further down the counter next to another man. He looked at the guy, sitting there quietly, and said: “I’m gonna have ta whip his a-- before I leave here.” The man said calmly: “You mean that man right there?” nodding towards my dad. The troublemaker said: “Yeah.” The quiet onlooker hauled off, and without any warning, punched the guy right in the face, knocking him onto the floor of Lovick’s Cafe.

The man didn’t know it, but the guy he’d been grumbling to, about my dad, saying he was going to have to “whip his a--”--was my dad’s brother--my Uncle “D.J.”

“THE LORD TOLD ME…”
At a church service, in Kinston, North Carolina, in the ‘70s, a prominent church member stood up, announcing to the preacher and the congregation, The Lord told me that the church needs to pray for brother “so-and-so.” A lady quickly spoke up, saying to the prominent church member: “Brother “so-and-so” is dead.”

THE TWO LADIES WITH HARRY
Wanting to acknowledge visitors at his church, in Kinston, North Carolina, the preacher addressed them saying: “Will the two ladies with Harry Butz please stand up?”